What Does Sex in a Dream Mean?
When you’re having sex in a dream it’s so easy to get caught up in the experience that you didn’t pay attention to anything else. The setting, the person you’re having sex with are just a couple of important factors to pay attention to.
Having sex in a dream means uniting yourself with something or someone in the deepest, most intimate way possible. This doesn’t necessarily mean you want to have sex with the person, it’s about the metaphorical representation of the person you’re uniting yourself with.
Dreams are subjective, which simply means they are specific to the feelings, tastes, and opinions of the dreamer. The people involved in the dream, the setting, the dreamer’s emptions are all vital to the meaning of the dream. I’ve explored the topic of sex dreams quite extensively because of a deeply impactful dream I had a couple of years ago. Before we get to that, let’s take a closer look at what it means to have a sex dream.
The Meaning of Dream Sex
There are multiple reasons why people have sex dreams. Among the most common is the awakening of sexual desires. Living in a sex crazed society keeps the idea of sexiness and sexual desire front and center. At times, its hard to get the topic out of your mind. Since dreams utilize what’s going on in your waking life and thought life, to construct dreams, its only natural to dream about sex.
Another reason why you dream about sex is because you’ve had a recent sexual experience. Whether it was a good or bad experience, or somewhere in between, it’s quite common to think about the experience which can cause sexual related things to come up in your dreams. It’s not uncommon for this to show up as wet dreams.
The meaning of dream sex in the above cases is that they’re being caused by your physical body. It’s a body dream.
Sex dreams can get disturbing when you find yourself engaged in the act with someone you don’t know very well, someone you’re not attracted to, or even worse; someone you’re related to. The meaning behind these specific sex dreams is varied. Trauma dreams/nightmares often happen after a rape or other nonconsensual sexual experience.
Once specific experience I was told about was when a dreamer was a teenager her boyfriend told her he wanted to try something different. He talked her into participating in a sadomasochistic exploit in which she was blind folded. She didn’t like it at all and to her horror later discovered her boyfriend invited several of his buddies to participate.
This horrific and traumatizing event showed up in her dream as a nightmare in which she relived the experience and was quite difficult to shake.
When Sex Dreams are Confusing and Uncomfortable
Dreams are often confusing when dreamers have sex with celebrities or others they don’t know. Many times this means you’re uniting yourself with what that person means or represents to you.
An example of this is having dream sex with Brad Pitt or Angelina Jolie. This can mean you’re uniting yourself with adoption or the adoption process in some way. Likewise, having sex with Jim Carrey or Marienne Williamson means uniting yourself with their outspoken spirituality, or specifically Jim Carrey’s case self-deprication as he’s known for in his brand of comedy.
When you have a sexual dream involving a friend you’re getting close to or someone you’ve recently connected with, the dream is speaking about deep emotional intimacy.
If you find yourself having dream sex with with a boss or someone at work, the dream’s speaking to you about fully embracing and connecting on a deep level with what they represent in the company or what the company represents.
When these dreams involve family members the dream may be speaking to you about healing or reconnecting with them in an emotionally intense way.
All of these dreams can be uncomfortable to say the least, but if you take a minute to separate the literal meaning of sex from the dream and ask yourself what could this dream mean metaphorically, you could be in for a pleasant surprise.
Sexual Healing
Nothing is impossible or taboo when it comes to dreams. At times I seem to forget this and then I have a dream that reminds me about it all over again.
One night in December 2020 I fell asleep with nothing in particular in mind. I had a lot of dreams that night but promptly forgot nearly all of them. The only dream I remember is this one:
I found myself in the inner room of a dark, cold stone structure, reminiscent of a castle. I was having sex with a woman I didn’t know very well and I wasn’t at all attracted to.
End of Dream
I woke up from the dream confused and a bit disturbed. I don’t remember having any specific feelings in the dream, which caused me to think I was having meaningless sex. The dream really bothered me and I pushed it out of my mind immediately. I forgot about the dream but the dream refused to be forgotten.
About six months later the dream came back to me with an urgency. I just had to know what it meant. I had a thought to run the dream by a friend who introduced the idea that the dream was about my deep inner healing. At the time I hadn’t experienced any inner healing and i found this interpretation fascinating. I wan’t going through any inner healing at the time, so I decided to keep the dream in the back of my mind and wait to see what happened.
Interestingly enough, this same friend was impetus that initiated my inner healing process. My sex dream was not foretelling an illicit relationship on the horizon, but something much more meaningful and satisfying. Dreams are not always what they seem.
EB